This week I had a troubling experience. I was attending a meeting of a professional group- we were getting together to resolve an issue that had come up. The attendees included members of the leadership team and organization members.
The meeting started with a reiteration of the intent: to move forward and come to resolution. One member of the organization started yelling, aggressively gesturing, and refusing to hear questions or to allow others to speak. When reminded we were trying to move forward he started yelling again. This went on for about 10 minutes until a member of the leadership team removed him from the meeting to ‘take a walk.’
I have never, in almost 20 years of business seen a display that was so unprofessional or disrespectful of everyone in the meeting. We only have control of ourselves, we cannot control how others act, and we are individually responsible for behaving in a business-like professional manner. This person stepped far out of the bounds of professionalism
My question to you- Are you that person? Do you know that person? If you answered yes to either one you have other questions that need to be answered. If you are the offender (and it was offensive to everyone involved) you may want to take a look at your self- awareness and ability to handle conflict.
How you treat others is an indication of how you feel about yourself. If you have little or no respect for yourself or are driven solely by ego it is easy to disrespect others. If you respect yourself and believe you should be treated with respect, without being ego centric, it is easy to understand everyone wants to be and should be treated with respect. Think about your actions. Do they indicate how you feel about yourself? How you feel about others? Perhaps your treatment of others stems from a frustration or slight not associated with that specific person. Does you anger come from knowing you are doing something similar and in fear of ‘being found out’ (it doesn’t have to immoral, illegal or even unethical- you just need to feel uncomfortable about doing it). Are you acting out instead of resolving another situation?
If you are getting angry reading this you might be the person I am describing. And that’s ok- as long as you take the opportunity to rehab your actions. We all have things we need to work on. I encourage you to take a close look at how you interact with others and how you might improve those interactions. No one on the receiving end of that disrespect and un-professionalism will walk away with a good impression of you.
If you know someone who routinely acts in an unprofessional manner you could approach the person in a non-confrontational manner. The important thing is to approach them in a manner that is friendly, conversational, and not overly critical and to have genuine concern for the person you are speaking with. Any kind of aggression may be met with more aggression or derision. I suggest only approaching someone if you already have a trusting relationship with them and if you are prepared for the potential that they may not appreciate you pointing out a perceived fault.
We all deserve to be treated with respect regardless of how you feel about the person you are addressing. The bottom line is unprofessional and/or disrespectful behavior creates a negative environment and does not allow anyone to shine. The person displaying that behavior, whether they know it or not, is not creating a good impression of themselves or their business acumen.
You do the math, if you are not leaving a good impression people will certainly not take advantage of your other skills and that means few clients..
